Of Messes & Me AKA Shitty First Drafts:

Almost three years ago, I prepared to quit my job and backpack Europe by myself for six weeks.

It was a decision surprising to most people who knew me and perhaps the most surprising to myself. I've always played life on the safe side. To paint a picture, in high school, I was a gangly-limbed, frizzy-haired (this part has not changed) ambitious student who was in the marching band and president of the National Honors Society. I would go on to attend university in the hometown I grew up in and then stay there after graduation.

(You're welcome)

I'm not sure anyone would exactly describe me as a risk-taker...and then I quit my job and went to Europe solo.

Ironically, I started this blog to chronicle my European travels. Three blogs - that's how much I wrote - one of which was before my feet even left American soil. Hours upon hours of time spent crafting this website for three blogs worth and then I forgot about it. Until now.

So why has it taken me three years to restart this blog? A mix of laziness and procrastination is to blame but the root of it all is glaring perfectionism. Yes, that’s right. I, Kara Timberlake, am a recovering perfectionist.

When I thought about reviving "The Scribblin' Sojourner," I felt partly queasy, partly euphoric. I felt a bit pompous for having a blog - who wants to read my thoughts?

Yet, writing is my jam - it is what makes me feel alive. So here we are.

When I was in college, I became acquainted with writer Anne Lammott’s idea of “shitty first drafts” that transformed my concept of writing and also provided a much-needed commentary on how to live life.

Lammott writes, “[Perfectionism] will keep you cramped and insane your whole life, and it is the main obstacle between you and a shitty first draft...

Perfectionism is a mean, frozen form of idealism, while messes are the artist’s true friend...we need to make messes in order to find out who we are and why we are here — and, by extension, what we’re supposed to be writing.”

I think the same applies to living.

A lot of life has happened since I went to Europe. I’ve started two new jobs + a side hustle, bought a house, totaled my car & then subsequently bought a new one, ran a marathon (#humblebrag), fell in love and then out of love, lost people dear to me, welcomed a fur child, and also gained new opportunities and relationships.

Three years after my trip, I’m able to look upon my adventures from a different perspective. I’ve come to the realization that sometimes, the inner critic cannot be quieted - however, it can be persisted upon.

Here’s to writing and living out shitty first drafts.

Your friend, K